I am by far my worst critic.
It’s like the inner “me” wants to recognize weakness or failure before anyone else has the chance to.
I struggle with focus and time management, and the other day after committing to be on time getting out the door, I ended up being later than ever for an appointment. I sighed heavily as we were pulling out of the driveway and said offhandedly, but out loud (with my three kids all ears), “Sometimes I really hate myself.” The second it came out of my mouth, I knew it was not only a terrible thing to say (I can’t tell you how many times I’ve told my children never to use the word “hate”), but that in that moment seeds were sown into my children that could never be taken back. They might take root, they might not. But because of my careless words, they were in there. I was heartbroken.
So you can imagine how devastated I was when one of my kids made a bad choice and had to suffer a consequence, and I heard him say, “I hate myself.”