Have you ever wondered what the gospel looks like in real life?
I didn’t plan ahead. Well, I did. I planned to do four days of work in one morning.
It was a bad plan.
On the morning in question, I got multiple phone calls needing me to step out of my office and into other situations. Situations I couldn’t say no to. Situations I wouldn’t say no to.
To top it all off I was out of sugar to sweeten my morning coffee. I had issues to say the least.
In addition to my four days of work, I had planned to run to the store, make a costume for my daughter’s school project, and take care of a whole slew of other errands that day. Between basketball practice and dental appointments, my day was jam-packed from beginning to end.
But In the Middle of My Mess…
One of my new tasks was picking up the yard before an unexpected rain shower. My mind was running a million miles a minute while I trudged around the yard picking up belongings that couldn’t weather the storm. I wasn’t upset with anyone but me. And while I would happily love and serve my family, a sense of panic was rising within.
I was silently beating myself up while trying to beat the storm.
Why didn’t I plan better? Why wasn’t I further ahead. Was I even qualified to do any of it? Was this really my calling? I obviously wasn’t the best choice. Maybe God was trying to tell me something. Maybe He wanted me to hand off my ministry or graciously step down. How could you tell the difference between God’s prompting and Satan’s schemes anyways? Obviously it wasn’t dependent on my own opinions in the moment. What did God want from me?
And in the middle of my mess, I sensed that whisper deep within my soul. The one that could only be Jesus. The panic ceased, and I knew the answer was found in the gospel.
The Gospel for Real Life
“For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but in order that the world might be saved through him.” (John 3:16-17)
God loves me so much He sent His Son to live and die for me. And not just me, but everyone. He created me to bring Him glory. To shine His light to the world. That’s what my ministry and obligations are truly about.
It’s about pointing people to Jesus. In the middle of my mess, I can do that because it’s not about me. It’s not about whether or not I have it all together. It isn’t about whether or not I’m caught up or have a good plan. It’s about knowing we are loved by God no matter where life find us.
God’s Got This
Looking back on my blog posts, it is obvious that I am a failure by the world’s standards. Nobody would ever look at me and think #lifegoals or even #squadgoals. I’m better defined by #hotmess and #lifehappens. But God doesn’t pick out the perfect people to do His will. He doesn’t stand back and wait for the cream of the crop to fight their way to the top and then send them on a mission for Him.
God calls the runts out of the field and makes them Kings. He singles out the faithful, even if they are failures. And that’s where I found myself today. I have no idea how my morning will play out. I don’t know if I’ll get it all done. But I know God is with me. I know that I am unworthy, and I know He called me anyway.
Maybe I just need to unplug for a moment and read Exodus 3. When Moses told God he was unworthy, when he questioned his calling, God didn’t offer up reassurances, He just told Moses that He had it under control. It wasn’t about Moses, it was about God. And the same is true in my life and in my calling. It’s not about me, it’s about Jesus.
P.S. If you wrote a post recently about Moses and God just needing his stick – I loved it, and lost it (#truestory) – please let me know in the comments below and I’ll highlight it here.
This is an edited excerpt from Heather’s upcoming anthology, Candid Conversations. (Or more like the rough draft of one of the chapters.) While each story in the anthology shares a unique perspective, the prevailing theme is that we all struggle, but there is hope to be found in Jesus. Coming August 13th, 2018. Kindle edition now available for pre-order.