I got this knot in the pit of my stomach.
I was overwhelmed by this feeling of failure. Like I could never do it on my own. Like I was going to fail.
Our book, Candid Conversations was launching in less than a week and I felt so unworthy.
I had been writing and publishing books for over a decade, but this one was different. This time I was alone… only I wasn’t.
I was working with an amazing group of women, but they saw me as their fearless leader.
But fearless I wasn’t.
Sinking Beneath The Waves
While I have no trouble bearing my soul and sharing my struggles, I am afraid of failure. Afraid of falling short and dropping the ball.
Because I’m good at that.
I’ve done it before.
When push comes to shove, I’m tempted to shut down not rise above.
I get lost in the what ifs.
What if I do this and it’s all for nothing?
What if I promise something I can’t deliver?
Or instead of pointing to Jesus and brining Him glory, I point to Him and shame His name?
Those are just some of the fears that flooded my heart that day. I felt like I was drowning in all of my doubts and I found it hard to breath. If you have never had a panic attack, let me tell you, they are nothing to sneeze at, but this one was halted before it got to be full-blown.
So, what stopped the fears that were trying to overtake me that day?
Walking With Jesus
I know that sounds like a simple and trite answer, but it’s all that there is. And the best that there is.
I didn’t open my Bible or remember a Scripture. There was no song that played over the radio that captured my heart and I didn’t turn on my favorite worship song. I did nothing.
While I was sinking beneath the waves of panic and fear, Jesus invaded my thoughts and steadied my soul.
It started small, with just the name of Jesus.
But there is power in the name of Jesus.
And while I still didn’t know what lay ahead, I knew that I could face it with Jesus by my side.
Encouragement For Today
I don’t know where today finds you, but I hope you found that as encouraging as I did. Because walking with Jesus isn’t hard. He is simply there and ready to help you with whatever you need, He is just waiting for you.
Are you walking through something stressful today?
What helps you de-stress when life threatens to overwhelm you? Is there a Bible verse you read, do you unplug, go for a walk, turn on music? Let us know what works for you in the comments below.
If you liked this blog post, you’ll love Heather’s book, Candid Conversations. While each story shares a unique perspective, the prevailing theme is that we all struggle, but there is hope to be found in Jesus. Get your copy from Amazon or click here to learn more.